Richard Thruster

To explain why I’m done with my favorite club, let’s take a second to go over my tab from the Dolphin I the other night:

Cover: $5
Beer: $5 including tip x 2
Singles while at the rack: $30
Couch dances: $60

What is that? $105? And of that, the club, I’m guessing, cleared at least $60. Just for argument, let’s say they only cleared $50. After a few hours in there, I’d grown tired of beer and wanted to switch to water. I’ve done it literally hundreds of times before. I’ll walk up to the bar (waitresses *always* overcharge for a glass of water), ask for a glass of ice water, the bartender hands me the glass, I slide her a buck, and I get on with my night. No muss. No fuss.

Well apparently you can’t get a glass of ice water at the Dolphin anymore. Now you get a 20 oz bottle of water for $4.50. It took me a second to process that. Here they’ve just made somewhere between $50 and $75 on me and now they want another $4.75 on a bottle that cost them maybe $.50? There’s no way. Especially when it’s cheaper to drink beer.

I guess they’re keeping up with the Jones’. And that’s fine. I’ll go find another favorite place that’ll let me sober up for free.

Here’s a guy who visited every strip club in Detroit this year. If I had to guess, I’d say I’m probably somewhere between 35 and 40% not counting jack shacks, and I’m not too enthused to visit too many more of those. So the goal now is every one of them by Memorial Day. A doable goal, I think.

Here’s a map to help guide me toward my destination.

Beginning January 1, walking into a strip club in Texas will cost an extra five bucks. The state believes the tax will get them an extra $40 million per year. The proceeds will go toward helping rape victims.

“This is an industry that largely employs women, and this gives them an opportunity to raise funds for a crime that affects women,” said state Rep. Ellen Cohen, a Houston Democrat who sponsored the bill, approved by the Legislature in May.

“I’ve been told the fees to get into these places can be $10, $15. I don’t think another $5 is going to prevent someone from going,” said Cohen, who is also president of a women’s center that could get funding from the new law.

“I’ve been told?” Nice. She is right though that an extra $5 isn’t going to stop anyone. It’s the principle. Taxing unappealing speech can create serious unintended problems. If only strip clubs had a lobby like the NRA.

As I mentioned last week, I had a great time down at the Dolphin I a while back.  I never got around to writing about it.  Eh.  Things happen.

I did want to talk briefly about something that really stuck with me though.  Well, something besides the lovely Scarlett, my future ex-wife.  There was a younger blonde in there.  She was maybe 21 or 22.  Anyway, she was the first girl I saw.  Beautiful and built.  She came down to give me a close-up several times during her set, her breasts right in my face.

“I love my breasts,” she told me as she brushed them against my cheek.

I threw a few more dollars her way to show my appreciation, and like that she was off the stage.

When her turn came back around, I made sure to sit front and center.  Sometimes dancers are like rides at amusement parks.  When you find one you like, you keep going back for more.  So it was with this one.  Just so…perky.

It was her third set when I finally discovered the source of her giddiness.  After she removed her top, she reached up toward the ceiling and in the process revealed matching 4-inch scars in the crease under each of her breasts.  They looked pretty fresh.  No wonder she couldn’t get enough of them!

I wasn’t a big fan of the fake breasts until a co-worker let me feel her up several years ago.  We were having a discussion about flashing while we were driving around looking at apartments.  She mentioned she almost had hers paid off and I didn’t believe her.  It had never dawned on me that she had implants.  Until then, I hadn’t given it much thought.  But when  she took my hand and… well… it turned into a long lunch.  Funny how one experience like that can change your opinion.

I’ve had a few conversations with girls about implants.  They’re always discreet when I ask whether another girl has had surgery.  They don’t comment.  And good for them, I say.  I’ve no idea what percentage of dancers have them.  It’s probably higher than I suspect.  Do they improve the bottom line?  Do they pay for themselves?  When well done, not the Dolly Parton double-G’s, but a nice C or maybe D,  I bet they probably do.

Your thoughts?

The Oregonian had a neat article about blogging on Thursday.  There was even a passing mention of yours’ truly in there.  How about that!

A reader writes:

Hey, Richard, I just read some of your blogs today and enjoy the way you write about Portland strip clubs. I haven’t been to them all, of course, but a large assortment from Dino’s to Exotica to Magic Gardens. Even been to a club in Key West and one in Medford. Anyway, there’s a new ‘Lingerie Modeling’ boutique on Mcgloughlin Blvd. about a block and a half away from the Dolphin I on the same side of the street. I believe it’s called ‘Saphire’, or something like that and was wondering if you might pay it a visit and give a review in your blog? I know nothing about the place, other than seeing postings on Craigs from some of the girls that work there. I’d like to know what you think.

Interesting. The girls post on CraigsList? Hmmm…I’ll have to check that out.

As for visiting a jack shack?  Yech.  Not high on my list of things to do.  Although I did meet a girl a few weeks back who’s curious about such places.  So maybe she and I will go visit together.  Perhaps.

I was going to hit J-Mack’s party last night at the Safari, but ended up going home instead.  The sign outside said there would be a porn star performing, but for the life of me I can’t find any information on her.  Someone needs to let me know when Aurora Snow is coming to town.  That will be a can’t miss party.

Had a fantastic time out at the Dolphin I last week.  Still working to get everything out, but I’m stuck.  I guess that means it’s time to forge ahead into new clubs.  Do I bite the bullet and hit the Devil’s Point and DV8, two places I’ve heard good things about but have been trying like the dickens to avoid.  Or is there someplace else I should check into first?

Here’s something for the CraigsList girls to strive toward.

A Chilean prostitute has auctioned 27 hours of sex to raise money for the country’s largest charity during an annual fund-raising campaign.

Maria Carolina became an overnight celebrity in the conservative Roman Catholic country, making news headlines and appearing on talk shows since she made her unusual donation to the televised charity event, which runs for 27 hours starting on Friday evening.

“I’ve already auctioned off the 27 hours of love,” Maria Carolina told Reuters on Wednesday, saying she had raised about $4,000. “One of my clients already paid. It seemed like a good deed to him.”

You can read the whole thing here.

Last week BlogTown told the story of a former co-worker of mine who’s suing Qwest for wrongful termination. This week they tell the story of former Fantasy Adult Video general manager Denny O’Neil, Jr. who’s suing the video chain for wrongful termination. That in itself isn’t all that entertaining. Some of the allegations he makes, though, are.

O’Neil alleges customers and employees regularly retired to the video rooms to engage in sex. I’ll admit, in this semi-anonymous forum, that I used to be a regular at the Fantasy Video in Tigard and on Burnside. I haven’t been to either location for many years, so things may have changed. I can say, only once did I see anything out of the ordinary there. It was late one night in Tigard and a “professional” woman was wandering the aisles. After she agitated a few customers, she was escorted out the door.

That’s it! Once. So apparently I wasn’t taking full advantage Fantasy’s services. Seriously though, I can’t think of a worse way to meet someone or worse place to have sex than in a video booth. Seems very Larry Craig to me.